I just wanted to open a package of baby wipes in the bathroom. The shrink wrap was, as usual, attached to the box like glue. I rummaged through my cosmetic drawer for a pair of scissors but with no luck. Getting anxious to get back to the grandchild baby who was waddling around my room with a fresh, very pungent diaper, I searched for anything with a point to get the damn silky screen off the box. I grabbed an emory board which snapped in half with no penetration whatsoever of the package barrier. In exasperated desperation I seized my eyelash curler and scratched furiously at the slick plastic to make any kind of slit where I could stick my fingernail or the now broken emery board and peel off the infuriatingly gluttonous shell. I finally got it moving away from its captive but in doing so the released web of silky film wrapped itself around my hand sucking itself to my skin with a vengeance. Meanwhile the baby and the scent drifted on about the house.
The packaging industry has absolutely taken over our lives. In addition to depleting the world’s supply of petroleum used in making these plastic substances, they are driving people to insanity by producing packages simply impossible to open.
The other day I gave a somewhat educational toy to a little boy. It was an instrument to look at bugs close up. I know you’re thinking. . “who needs a toy to look at bugs?” But I thought it was better than another truck and who knows, maybe Dr. Leakey started with a magnifying glass in his backyard. Anyway, the toy was imbedded between rock hard sheets of plastic extruded to fit the object, as are dozens of products on the market today.
The boy immediately knew he needed a pair of scissors and bolted for the kitchen followed frantically by all the attending adults. Amidst hysterical admonitions by some of ‘Don’t let him use those scissors” to “These scissors aren’t strong enough!” someone managed to cut an opening in the top of the package. It was passed to my husband who actually worked in the packaging industry to spread the plastic apart. His face got red with exertion but said he couldn’t budge the covering; did anyone have a pair of hedge clippers? Or a hacksaw? Someone found a pair of poultry shears which were used by another grown-up to make a vertical slit long enough to wrench the wretched toy out and hand to the little boy who by this time may have lost all interest in the present anyway.
It is absurd that manufacturers of items of so little value feel it necessary to use such space age technology and wrapping to get their products to the consumer. And it is further obnoxious that the consumers need to use such Herculean efforts to get to what they have bought, usually something relatively inexpensive, as well.
Have you tried to open a package of peanut butter crackers while driving? Or a box of thin mints? You need a Swiss Army knife attached to your steering wheel. Biting the edge of the package no longer does it. Talking on the cell phone while at the wheel is nowhere near as dangerous as the driver trying to open a package of M and M’s.
Either my teeth and fingers are not as effective as they used to be or packages have become so sanitarily, technologically secure that the average consumer needs to have appendages like Edward Scissorhands to get through the day.
In a somewhat related event, today I received a package of new bank checks for my checking account. Now. . again. . you are probably thinking. . who uses paper checks anymore. Well I do, for some things. The point here is that that check books arrived not in the traditional check book sized box, but in a flat envelope. The box to contain the check books was in three pieces with very vague instructions on how to assemble. I am very clever so after about 45 minutes, I managed to produce a box sufficient to hold the checks.
So what is this? Some stuff we need to use is wrapped up so that it takes us 45 minutes to open and other stuff requires 45 minutes to wrap up so we can use it. Huh???
This is madness.
Love, Carol. Dot.Com
Grandparenting 101
The Bragging Absolution
Identity Verification
And I Have a Ton of Sippy Cups!
Flunking Dog Bath
Wrapping It Up
Back To Homepage
